Tax, Tax and More Tax.

Tobacco kills. They spend millions warning us it does, millions on studies to show it does, millions on pictures showing the hideous results to put us off doing it, but do they ban it? Nope. They tax it.

They tell us we shouldn’t be doing it or inflicting passive smoking on others because it gives them cancer of the face and they provide terrifying pictures to prove it. But do they ban it, I ask again? No. Why? Because they want the tax revenue, because many of them work for the tobacco companies and because they don’t really give a flying fig whether you die or not just as long as they are raking in the tax money.

Ken Clarke works for tobacco companies that push cigarettes to children in Africa, laying on free music festivals to attract them where they can have cigarettes given to them to get them hooked in a cool place with cool sounds. He would spout about how bad it is over here, but he is a pusher in the third world, just as bad as any crack seller. That Dragon bloke, Duncan Bannatyne, fronted a very illuminating documentary about all this a couple of years back and, apparently, the tobacco company Clarke works for actually gives free cigarettes to local shops in Africa so they can hand them out to kids to get them addicted nice and early and create millions of life long customers – and tax payers. When confronted by Bannatyne with the evidence, cuddly Ken put his head down, refused to say a word, scuttled away like the insect he is and fled in his chauffeur driven limo.

Marijuana is a plant and so is tobacco and both have good effects as well as bad (cigs help prevent Alzheimer’s and dope eases pain, etc), but are you allowed to grow either one without being arrested? No. You can’t grow marijuana because they can’t tax it and you can’t grow tobacco because they – yep – can’t tax it. One is illegal and one isn’t but you are not allowed to grow either, but only because they can’t tax it.

If they could make growing tomatoes in your garden illegal, they would, and in places they are already trying to. And why? Because they can’t tax home grown food, or profit from it, or genetically frankenstein it before you consume it.

So who are these people? What gives them the right to say I can smoke tobacco and pay tax on it, but I can’t grow it? Tobacco is just leaves, after all, so why am I not allowed to grow some in my garden? Who made them God and said I can get lung cancer from smoking, but only if I pay the manufacturers of it, plus the tax on top? Who said they are right to tell me not to smoke a joint, but they can go to their tax-free bar and swallow brandy until their brains are addled?

Who gave them any of these rights? Not me, was it you? If they could legalise cannabis and tax it, they would do it tomorrow, but it’s a sore point with their blue-rinse supporters and the companies they all work for can’t control it, so no way will they let you have a crafty puff they haven’t profited from.

The CIA are the biggest drug runners on the planet and our lot pretend to be fighting drugs, but the truth is they only fight the drugs they can’t control, tax, or profit from. Look at some of the terrible side effects of legal drugs, but that’s ok because the drug companies are raking in huge profits from them. Thalidomide anyone?

In the past I smoked dope a thousand times and I’ve been drunk ten thousand times. What was the difference? None of it was big or clever (downright stupid, in fact) and probably did me no good at all, but when I used to puff, apart from not waking up with a headache, I wasn’t paying tax to the criminals who run the world and that’s why they don’t like it. Get cheap fags from abroad, do they take them off you at customs because they will make you ill, of course not. They take them because you haven’t paid them enough tax.

This was written about America, but it applies all over…

Tax his land, Tax his bed, Tax the table, At which he’s fed.   Tax his tractor, Tax his mule, Teach him taxes Are the rule.   Tax his work, Tax his pay, He works for peanuts anyway!   Tax his cow, Tax his goat, Tax his pants, Tax his coat.   Tax his ties, Tax his shirt, Tax his work, Tax his dirt.   Tax his tobacco, Tax his drink, Tax him if he Tries to think.   Tax his cigars, Tax his beers, If he cries Tax his tears.   Tax his car, Tax his gas, Find other ways To tax his ass.   Tax all he has Then let him know That you won’t be done Till he has no dough.   When he screams and hollers; Then tax him some more, Tax him till He’s good and sore.   Then tax his coffin, Tax his grave, Tax the sod in Which he’s laid…   Put these words Upon his tomb, ‘Taxes drove me to my doom…’   When he’s gone, Do not relax, Its time to apply The inheritance tax.   Accounts Receivable Tax Building Permit Tax CDL license Tax Cigarette Tax Corporate Income Tax Dog License Tax Excise Taxes Federal Income Tax Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA) Fishing License Tax Food License Tax Fuel Permit Tax Gasoline Tax (currently 44.75 cents per gallon) Gross Receipts Tax Hunting License Tax Inheritance Tax Inventory Tax IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax) Liquor Tax Luxury Taxes Marriage License Tax Medicare Tax Personal Property Tax Property Tax Real Estate Tax Service Charge Tax Social Security Tax Road Usage Tax Recreational Vehicle Tax Sales Tax School Tax State Income Tax State Unemployment Tax (SUTA) Telephone Federal Excise Tax Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax Telephone Recurring and Nonrecurring Charges Tax Telephone State and Local Tax Telephone Usage Charge Tax Utility Taxes Vehicle License Registration Tax Vehicle Sales Tax Watercraft Registration Tax Well Permit Tax Workers Compensation Tax     STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY? Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.   We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.

Got a spare bedroom, they’re even taxing those now. Many years ago, they had a window tax, so even free sunlight was taxed. See many old buildings with bricked up windows, well the window tax is why they bricked them up. Maybe you should brick up your spare bedroom and pretend it doesn’t exist…

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About tonyjayg

I'm a great bloke. That's all you need to know. ;)
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4 Responses to Tax, Tax and More Tax.

  1. Heather says:

    I wasn’t aware that the tobacco companies were giving free ciggies to kids in Africa. Not really surprised though.
    Since the NHS seems intent on discriminating against smokers though, perhaps the tobacco companies could intitiate a sign-up of existing addicts and contribute to a private health care scheme for them? Smokers contribute way more in tax than they cost the NHS , facts that are conveniently buried by the anti smoking nazis! Smokers also die younger, costing the country less in pensions. They have ruined many landlords jobs because of a ludicrous law forcing smokers outdoors to smoke when they have already paid over three times as much for the drinks in the pub – another source of tax.
    I’d personally rather someone blew smoke in my face than the hot air of fascism.

    • tonyjayg says:

      Well said Heather. And the anti-smoking brigade see no hypocrisy in branding me a bad person for smoking and then getting in a gas guzzling motor and belching out thousands of times more polutants in a day than I do in a year. As for Clarke and imperial tobacco, Duncan Banatyne (if that’s how you spel his name) did a programme where he went to africa and saw for himself. They give small shops a certain number of free cigarettes and these are given away to get people hooked. They run pop concerts for free and when the kids turn up, they give them t-shirts, baseball caps and free cigarettes. Duncan asked a class of school kids aged about 11/12 how many smoked and all but one hand went up. Then he doorstepped Ken Clarke and asked him about it, but Clarke just kept his head down and refused to answer. What a tosser. And your remark about the cost to the NHS is bang on. When I was at Uni 15 years ago I looked into the figures and the tax revenue at the time was around 8 billion with the total cost of health care for smokers running at approximately 10% of that. In addition, don’t forget a number of those people may well have developed their illnessess anyway, cigarettes either not being the cause or simply hurrying it along. I know someone who quit smoking over 30 years ago and now they have cancer. No doubt she will be added to the smoking kills figures anyway. I know smoking is bad, but skiers and mountain climbers and hang gliders get injured and killed, should we ban all those activities as well? What about booze? That causes more disease and social problems than cigs, any fear of it being banned, none whatsoever. Here’s a fact, the NHS kills more people each year with MRSA and other bugs, perhaps we should shut all those unhealthy hospitals…

  2. Dioclese says:

    If people want to smoke themselves to death I say fuck it – it’s a free country…

    …only it’s not is it?

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