One is the Hotel Inspector off the telly, Alex Fabrizzi (or a surname that sounds a little less like an air freshener which currently escapes me), the other is Victoria Coren, poker player, journalist and novelist. What they have in common is being feisty, funny, sardonic, articulate and highly intelligent. Which proves I am not a man who is in any way threatened by clever, independent women.
I would revel in having a long intellectual conversation with either one of them. Failing that, I would play strip poker with Victoria and get Alex to inspect my bedroom. Vic would win at poker, no doubt, and Alex would tell me my bedroom was a shithole, but I’m prepared to take that risk.
Difficult to choose between them as they are both so intriguing and attractive. Victoria has a sexy, gravelly voice, which rings my bell, but Alex definitely has the best pair of jugs and probably gets hotel rooms for free. Alex also has dark, flashing eyes and dimples in her cheeks when she smiles, which I’ve always been a sucker for.
I’m just waiting for her to call. Any minute now I expect. Hope Victoria isn’t too disappointed, bless her. There’s only so much of me to go around girls. Sorry.
Then again, if the two of them don’t mind sharing, I could die a very, very, very happy man. A three-handed game of strip poker – one opponent blond the other dark – in a hotel room thrown in gratis by the management, with a hot tub and room service…
Life doesn’t get any better than that, does it?
Who? Katie Price, aka Jordan, are you mad? I wouldn’t borrow yours and do that tripehound. No, I’ve made my choices thanks and I’m sticking with them.